Eight Days in the Sun Read online

  “Windows with heavy blackout curtains so we can shut out the world whenever we need.”

  “It’s the perfect plan.”

  This is dangerous. I should have stopped us three dreams ago. Tomorrow’s our last day, and we need to face reality. Rob Jorgenson’s advice weighs heavily on my mind. It rings true because I’ve seen it happen firsthand. Now, there is no question Kiran would be faithful to me. This girl is loyal to a fault. But do I really want to hold her back from all the experiences she deserves? Even if she’d consider being with me in these uncertain circumstances, there are other worries too. I watched her jump out of a plane and almost had a heart attack. What the hell am I gonna do if I’m halfway around the world and she’s in trouble? I couldn’t get to her. I would lose my concentration, my thoughts all straying to her without my consent. I need every shred of focus, now more than ever. I am embarking on a journey that will lead me down paths unknown. Ironically, Kiran and I are not unlike these abandoned sandcastles. What we have is beautiful, but it’s not meant to last.

  She leans her forehead against mine. “I love you, Mason Cutler.”

  Is it more honorable to be honest or to lie to her? I have no idea. But hearing her affirm what I feel in my heart makes it impossible to hold back. Tonight, under the stars and next to the surf, we can dream. We’ll worry about waking up tomorrow.

  “I love you too, Kiran Shenoy.”

  Trouble is, love isn’t enough.

  Chapter 18

  Kiran

  We both stand in front of the door to the Sweetheart’s Suite. There is a huge heart-shaped wreath of twined red roses nailed to the door. We turn to each other.

  “Is this weird?” Mason asks.

  “We won’t know until you open the door.”

  We ran into the Jorgenson’s when we came down for breakfast this morning. Melanie’s sister went into labor so they had to cut their honeymoon short. Since the room was paid for and non-refundable, they insisted we take it.

  I am a little skeptical, but ever since that first day, I’ve been curious what it looks like.

  He inserts the keycard and opens the door. He gestures for me to enter first. My feet sink into the soft plush carpet as I enter. I blink several times trying to take it all in. This room is at least three times bigger than a regular room.

  “This is so…”

  “Tacky,” Masons says.

  I laugh. “Yeah.”

  “It looks like Cupid took a dump in here.”

  Although I would not have used that particular description, Mason does have a point. The walls are Pepto-pink adorned with pictures of beach sunsets. There’s a tall, plastic palm tree with white twinkle lights in one corner next to a red velvet-covered loveseat. A section of the room is done up in black and white tiles where a heart-shaped Jacuzzi is embedded in the floor. A couple of free-standing Grecian style columns anchor the bed. The bed itself is massive and covered with enough pink petals to build a Rose Bowl float. Melanie is right about the candles. They are on every surface along with vases of silk flowers. At least the maids have been through and everything looks clean. It’s just a lot for the eye to take in.

  “Why would anyone stay here?” Mason asks.

  “Because of that.” I point to the bank of glass sliding doors that frame the ocean view. They take up the entire far wall of the room. The view from my room is amazing, but this one is nothing short of spectacular. Mason slides the glass door open. He takes my hand and leads me to the wide balcony with two chaises and a crystal blue glass fireplace.

  I lean on the railing. He places his palm on the small of my back and lets out a low whistle. “This is nice. We can spend the night out here.”

  I shrug. “I don’t know. The inside is gaudy, but I don’t mind it if you don’t.”

  “Whatever you want, sweetheart.” He wraps his arms around me. “As long as I get to have you.” He traces the shell of my ear with his tongue. I lean against his muscular chest as he kisses his way down my neck. His hands move up my sides and over my breasts. Even through my shirt and bra, they pebble with his touch.

  My entire body quivers as he peppers kisses against my neck. Something hard pokes into my lower back.

  “What’s that?” I say, although it comes out a garbled mess.

  “You really have to ask?” He slaps my bottom. For some reason, it makes me feel tingly all over. He rubs the area tenderly before he pushes himself against me. “That, darling, is what you do to me.”

  There are people on the beach below us. I’m no exhibitionist, but the way he touches me makes me forget about everything. Thankfully, my rational mind prevails. “Mason, take me to bed.”

  “Now we’re speaking the same language.” He picks me up.

  I yelp in surprise. Then he crushes his mouth against mine so hard I fall into a trance. When he throws me on the bed, I bounce a couple times.

  He sidles next to me and unbuttons my shirt with one hand while kissing each inch of revealed skin. His teeth grasp the cup of my bra and lower it. Mason’s different tonight. He’s rougher, his intense blue eyes growing darker with lust, his stance almost predatory. The real shocker is how much I love it. I get lost in his touch. I lay my head back and stare at the ceiling.

  “Oh my God.”

  “What?”

  I point upward.

  He tilts his head. “Mirror over the bed. Perfect touch.”

  “It’s awful.”

  He smiles. “Not so bad, peaches.”

  “I can’t look at myself when we’re…”

  He fingers my exposed nipple. “You don’t know what you look like when you come. I’ve seen it firsthand. It’s a stunning sight. One I’d never trade. Not even for the most beautiful sunrise or sunset. So yeah, look at yourself in the fucking mirror, Kiran. See what I see. While you’re at it, remember who’s making you feel this way.”

  “How could I forget?”

  He doesn’t answer me. Instead, he works his way down my body and undoes my jeans. He slides them off in one smooth motion. I lean on my elbows and watch him discard his own clothes. His erection springs out of his boxers. He strokes himself, his eyes locked with mine.

  “Take everything off. I don’t want to see you wearing anything except a satisfied smile.”

  There’s an edge to his voice, a command I obey. I reach behind my back to unclasp my bra. Then I hook my fingers into the side of my panties and bring them down my legs.

  “Touch yourself, Kiran.”

  I can barely function. I squirm at my own touch. My whole body is overly sensitive. I slide my other hand over my breast. The slightest movement might set me over the edge.

  “Make yourself come, Kiran. I’m gonna stand right here and watch you watch yourself.”

  “I want you, Mason.”

  “And you’ll have me. But right now, I need you to do this for me.” His voice still has the edge, but there is a plea in the command.

  I stare at myself and roll my hips against the push of my fingers. I can’t believe how slick I am. The mirror shows a girl I’ve never met. She’s sexy and shameless. Her body is a bit damaged but beautiful all the same. I bite my lower lip and increase the tempo. I arch my back, completely lost in my own world. Of course, I still feel his presence, especially as his breathing becomes ragged. I’ve never made myself come before, not for lack of trying. But it’s different this time. I’m self-indulgent and greedy for this pleasure. I take it all in, the reflection of a lusty girl on a down comforter as soft as a cloud surrounded by a hundred pink rose petals. I keep my eyes open as I lunge over the precipice. He’s right. It’s a beautiful sight.

  His words replay in my head. Remember who’s making you feel this way.

  He was talking about me, not him.

  I hear the rip of the condom one second before he’s on top of me. Then inside of me. I cry out at the sudden attack. He stops.

  He sucks in a breath. “I’m sorry, baby. I n
eed you right now. Should I stop?”

  I clutch his arms and move my hips up to deepen our connection. “Never. I’m yours.”

  His expression darkens with every thrust. I wrap my legs around his hips. I stare at the muscles of his back in the mirror. His sculpted ass. The flex of his powerful legs as he fucks me. He sucks and bites my neck. I grip a fistful of bed sheet along with a handful of rose petals.

  “Mason, I lo—”

  His mouth is on me swallowing the rest of the sentence.

  Then I can’t speak. At least nothing understandable. I let go again. We cling to each other, our body’s slick, our breaths harsh, and our hearts pounding.

  He lifts his head. I trace the curve of his smile with my finger. He pushes a strand of hair from my forehead and kisses me. It’s so tender and completely clashes with the rough sex we just had. But it’s exactly what I need.

  He goes to the bathroom. I leer at his beautiful butt the whole way. When he returns, the bed dips with his weight. He lies on his back next to me. We both stare at the image of us.

  “What do you think of the mirror now, Kiran?”

  “It’s cool.”

  “Just cool?”

  “Okay, that was really hot. I totally get the lesson too, professor.”

  He laughs. “Lesson? I just wanted to witness you get yourself off.”

  I lean on my elbow. “Shut up, I’m on to you, Cutler, and what you were trying to show me.”

  “And what’s that?”

  I have no idea how to put all the crazy, passionate emotions into words. “The power was with me all along.”

  He quirks an eyebrow. “Baby, I’m gonna need some nachos for all that cheese.” He bursts out laughing.

  I feign being offended. For the love of Dorothy and her ruby red slippers, did I really just say that? I go to smack his chest, but his reflexes are sharp. He grabs my wrist before it makes contact and pulls me in for a deep kiss.

  Once we calm down, I lay my head on his chest and listen to his heartbeat. I’m trying to live in this moment, but the room is drenched in amber light, signaling the sun’s departure. I trace the words inside the inked star on his arm. “It means love.”

  “What does?”

  “The words inside the star tattoo. I’ve been trying to figure it out. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” I tilt my head, trace the star on his arm and the words once more. “I wasn’t sure what the ‘it’ meant, but it’s referring to love.” I know those aren’t just words. It’s a code Mason lives by.

  He strokes my hair. “Correct.”

  “Let’s talk about the future.”

  “Okay, tell me all about Iowa.”

  “Not my future, Mason. Our future.”

  He swallows. There is something in his expression that causes the room to feel ten degrees colder.

  “We don’t have one.” He slices through every shred of hope.

  I push myself off him. “You can’t mean that.”

  “Kiran, listen to me. You haven’t been living for the past few years. I’m not going to deny you any experiences.”

  “You won’t. I love you and you love me. I’ll go to Iowa and you’ll go to the Marines. And we’ll be fine.”

  “We won’t. We’ve only known each other for what? Eight days.”

  “So you don’t love me?”

  “I didn’t say that.”

  “Then what the fuck are you saying?”

  “Calm down, Kiran. Let me explain myself. We’re on vacation in this tropical paradise and what works here doesn’t translate to the real world. Do you know how difficult it is to have a long distance relationship with someone in the military?”

  “I don’t know, but it doesn’t mean we can’t try.”

  “Thirty days a year. That’s what I get for leave. It’s not enough.”

  “I’ll take thirty days. It’s enough for me. We can write and e-mail and text and call and—”

  “It’s not enough for me. We’re not pretending to live in a sandcastle on the beach this time. I can’t dream with you anymore.”

  “Shut up, Mason. Don’t say anything else.”

  He doesn’t listen. “What if you meet someone who’s perfect for you? I know you. You’ll keep those feelings locked up because you’ll be scared of hurting me.”

  “I did meet someone who’s perfect for me, asshole. The last thing I’m doing is keeping those feelings locked up.”

  He reaches for my hand, but I pull it away.

  “Listen to me, Kiran, this isn’t easy for me either.”

  “Oh, you’re struggling with this, Mason? Because you seem to have it all figured out. Don’t I even get a say?”

  He shakes his head. “No, you don’t get a say. The bottom line is I can’t have you in my life either. I’d constantly be worried about you. Honestly, I need to be worried about me and Dana and the guys in my unit.”

  I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to hold in the tears, but they wrench free anyway.

  “Don’t cry. Please don’t cry,” he says in a raspy whisper.

  Too late, Mason. I get off the bed and run around the room gathering my clothes.

  “Where you going?”

  “Don’t worry about me. You have enough on your mind. There’s no room for me.”

  I can’t find my panties or bra so I just throw on my shirt and jeans. I finish buttoning the shirt as I walk toward the door.

  “Don’t leave.”

  “You left me.”

  I run down twelve flights of stairs and through the lobby. By the time I exit the huge revolving doors, I’m gasping for breath. I keep going anyway, jogging through deep sand, avoiding the bonfires and the live band. I walk across several hotels until I reach the fence. I climb it in my flip flops. It’s only when I reach the other side that I let myself cry. I sob so hard I fall to my knees. I cry until I can barely catch a breath.

  I flinch when a strong arm hooks around my shoulder.

  “Leave me alone, Mason.”

  “I won’t. I’m sorry I’m hurting you, but if you don’t think I’m hurting me too, you’re wrong. I’m slashing a knife through my gut.”

  “Then why?”

  “Because this killer pain will hurt less than five lonely years.”

  He wraps his arms around me. I don’t want to hug him back, but my heart is at odds with my head. The heart wins. I grab hold of him. I cry. He makes a muffled grunting sound like he’s trying to keep it together. We do this until the sky darkens, illuminated only by stars.

  I relax in his arms. I think about what he’s doing. I don’t agree with him, but I understand his sad rationale. Clearly, this is difficult for him too. These feelings are powerful, but it has only been eight days. We’re both headed in completely different directions. Where he’s going he doesn’t need to carry any additional weight. I hate him right now. But I love him too. I want to protect him, and maybe that means I make a sacrifice.

  So I’m going to soldier up and not make him feel any worse for this decision. Maybe we found refuge in the safe harbor of each other’s arm. But we have to keep moving toward the path we’ve set for ourselves. He wipes my tears and tucks a loose strand behind my ear. “Will you forgive me?”

  “Yes. We’re both young, and we haven’t tested ourselves. Life isn’t fruity drinks and walks on the beach and dreamy sandcastles.”

  “Right.” He exhales. “I want you to date other people, explore the world, and—”

  “Cutler, if you tell me to find myself, I will punch you in the nose.”

  He manages a weak smile. “I was going to say be yourself. People will fall in love with you. It’s very easy to do. I should know.”

  I kiss his cheek. “Don’t take any risks you don’t have to. When you’re busy protecting the rest of the world, promise me you’ll do everything to keep yourself safe. I worry you’ll forget.”

  “I promise.”


  “This is unfair.

  “It’s a raw hand. But sweetheart, know this, I wouldn’t trade these days for anything in the entire world. We just met at the wrong time.”

  “When is the right time?”

  He shrugs. “Don’t know. A year ago yesterday or maybe five years from tomorrow?”

  “Nothing we can do about a year ago yesterday.”

  “No, we can’t.” A flash of surprise flickers across his face. “We can try for five years from tomorrow, though.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Let’s make a pact. If neither of us has found anyone else and these feelings we have right now still exist in five years, then we will meet back here.”

  “That’s a ridiculous plan.”

  “I know it is. But it’s all I got. Just hear me out. In five years, you’ll be done with school and into your career. You’ll know what you want in this life. My contract will be over. I’ll be able to offer you more than thirty days a year.”

  “What if one of us doesn’t show?”

  “Then the other one moves on. No hard feelings.”

  “Can I write to you?”

  He shakes his head. “I don’t think it’s a good idea, Kiran. I really can’t deal with bits and pieces of you. In five years, if it’s right for both of us, I can give you all of me. Honey, I’ll be wanting all of you too.”

  “You know I’ll think the worst. What if something happens…?” God, I can’t even finish the sentence. Thankfully, I don’t have to.

  He places a finger under my chin and lifts my face to meet his. “I’ll make sure word gets sent to you.”

  “If I don’t show up, you won’t wonder what happened to me?”

  “Of course, I will. We’ll send a letter so the other one knows what happened. No hard feelings either way. If you’ve found happiness, then I’ll be happy for you. You do the same for me, Kiran.”

  “How do you propose we send a letter if I’m not even allowed to write to you?”

  He thinks about it for a minute. “We’ll send our letters in care of the hotel.”

  “But if something happens to you…”

  “I’ll have Dana post my letter to you.”